| God of the Wilderness - Where Are You Now? |
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“God of the Wilderness – Where Are You Now?” Pentecost 17A - October 9, 2011 The Rev. Carole Wageman Trinity Episcopal Church, Shelburne, VT Exodus 32:1-14; Psalm 106:1-6,19-23; Philippians 4:1-9; Matthew 22:1-14
This week my husband, Ed, said he had been privileged to discover God’s first name. I said – “Okay – tell me. What is God’s first name.” He said: “God’s first name is: OH.” Oh God. Actually, there is one prayer that we can probably safely say is the most petitioned prayer ever: “Oh, God – where are you now?” That straightforward plea from the human heart has been wept, howled, thundered, wailed and whispered since the beginning of humankind during times of trouble. “Oh God – where are you now?” The Divine response to that cry is often a mystery. The human response to that cry varies. There are very few who are able to actually embrace the spiritual stretch of waiting in the wilderness and trusting that God has heard and will respond. Most of us swing from hiding our woundedness (as though God won’t notice if we dig our heads into the sand) to a place of cynicism and despair when answers don’t appear immediately in our time frame or when an answer comes that isn’t the one desired. It is a great temptation to say: “God doesn’t hear me so, therefore, prayer doesn’t work.” Some --- like the Hebrew people in today’s reading from Exodus – take matters into their own hands and confront whatever or whomever is in front of them to fix things and make them feel better. “Oh God – where are you now?” might well have been what went through Aaron’s mind as he was surrounded by the fractious and demanding former Egyptian slaves who wanted answers and action. Can you blame them? Moses had been gone a long time back up on the mountain again. The people respond the way most people would: they began to get restless and anxious in this uncertain time. Insecurity was rising and they wondered: “Why hasn’t he returned yet? Is he ever coming back? Did he fall into a crevasse and is lying somewhere injured? Has he been eaten by a mountain lion? What if ---- what if he never comes back and we are just stuck here FOR-EVER???? What then?” Poor Aaron – brother of Moses --- faithful companion called by God to be the spokesperson with Moses during the entire time of confronting a Pharaoh of Egypt --- doing whatever God or Moses give him to do --- left in charge while Moses continues to collect God’s instructions for the people up on the holy mountain. But he was not Moses – he did not have that commanding presence. The people listened to Moses when he dealt with their complaints. Aaron didn’t have that kind of relationship or authority with the people…but he was in charge while Moses was away. And he might well have been asking those same questions that the freed slaves were asking: “What am I going to do now? O God – where are you NOW!” This story is a great model for studying leadership and triangles. We have Aaron. We have the People. We have the Anxiety. Can’t you just imagine Aaron’s angst when surrounded by all these unhappy people shouting out questions and demands at this one person standing alone who might well be feeling slightly adrift without a sail, rudder, or even a leaky boat. So Aaron lessens the anxiety of the situation by giving them what they think they need. He allows them to turn to old familiar customs as a way to be comforted. They take all their jewelry that had been given to them when they left Egypt – melt it down -- and make an idol – a golden calf of pure gold – an altar that provides a touchstone of familiarity …something that could be seen and touched around which they could dance and sing and worship. No more of this invisible God-stuff for them! The ways of the past were good enough for them before – they might be good enough for them now. It is interesting to wonder what might have been different if Aaron had been able to be a bit more creative in his leadership by trusting in God. While the people might have felt they were helpless and things were hopeless, they were neither stranded nor were they without possibility. They were in the middle of an “in-between” space much like any faith community might find itself from time to time. Instead of moving forward into the unknown, they tried to remain in the familiar which really had the ultimate effect of being stuck. It is one of those “inconvenient truths” that “People grow through challenge and not by simply being made to feel better about their plight.” [1] I recently read a great article by Beverly and George Thompson entitled “Finding Yourself in the In-Between” from the Alban Institute, and while they are discussing change in modern congregations, they draw from the lessons that are present in ancient stories such as today’s tale of the Hebrew people and their golden calf. Tuck into your head two things as I read what they have to say: 1) Where you hear the word “congregation”, you could also think “the community of freed Hebrew slaves”; 2) Remember how the Hebrew people fussed at Moses and wanted to go back to Egypt. “...Biblical stories remind us that the people of God are a people on a journey often living through in-between times. When they failed to create sacred time and space, our biblical ancestors found it difficult to focus on God’s leading, God’s providing, and God’s calling them to a specific purpose in that specific moment. Just as God calls each believer into a life of love and witness, so too does God call each congregation. That call might express itself a certain way for years; but eventually the circumstances that gave rise to a particular church will change. This community of faith may find itself wondering how to get back to the “good ol’ days.” But God’s invitation to congregations facing these in-between times is more challenging – yet also more faith-filled. God invites congregations to imagine how their own past might influence God’s call today and into the future...When things are rocking along as usual, it’s easy to forget that we are not just another group of people who happen to get together on Sundays. We are a people called by God – and God has a purpose for us.”[2] The Hebrew people were in a transition space – uncomfortable for sure, but if we step back and look at this from a 30,000 foot perspective, they were in the middle of God’s Story that was unfolding as they went along although it felt more like bitter wilderness while in the middle of it. Those transition spaces in our lives – in our congregations – in our larger world are moments of grace if we choose to see them as such. The question: “Oh God – where are you now?” is perhaps not really a question of where God is, but where we are in our understanding and ability to stand with courage and integrity in the in-between times trusting that in God’s kingdom, all things work for good. And to remember that in the middle of our muddle, it is the natural cycle of life that we die to one thing in order to rise to something new. The Hebrew people had to die to their old life of slavery in order to rise to their new identity as the People of God. Jesus’ disciples had to die to their old lives as admirers of Jesus and rise to a new Call as ambassadors of God’s Good News. Even the political and financial shifting within traditionally secure main line churches is that same process of something dying and something new being born. Like the newly freed Hebrew slaves dancing around a golden calf, we don’t change anything if we cling to the idols that are most familiar to us. And idols can be tricky to identify sometimes. In a recent daily devotional the Rev. Martin B. Copenhaver wrote a short piece about idols and suggests we ask ourselves four questions if we want to know what our idols are: Where is your ultimate loyalty? What do you consistently make time for? In what have you put your trust? Where can you be most deeply threatened? [3] So I asked myself those questions and I came up with some surprising answers for myself in wondering about the idols that get in my way of fully trusting that God knows what He/She is doing in my life.
That last one (Where can you be most deeply threatened?) is the most interesting question, I think, because that is what we protect out of fear. And sometimes the things we try to protect take the place of God – not always, but sometimes. We all have idols of one sort or another and sometimes they might be even good things. But they still rob us of some key spiritual promise when we invest our fullest energy and ultimate allegiance in those things rather than in the one true God. So, if you are disappointed in God’s performance lately, it might be because there is an idol or two hanging around that you haven’t even realized is there. Eugene Peterson, a pastor and respected writer, once said, “The assumption of spirituality is that always God is doing something before I know it. So the task is…to become aware of what God is doing so that I can respond to it and participate in it.[4] And sometimes that feels a lot like wandering in the wilderness and being tempted to create a golden calf to relieve the anxiety. “God must like transition spaces (such as wilderness experiences) because God sure creates a lot of them.”[5] That is a quote from the book Temporary Shepherds by Roger S. Nicholson. There is only one God worthy of our worship. And there is only one God who lays a wedding feast before us and bids us come to the table. There is only one God who wanders with us through the wilderness. There is only one God who asks us to trust in his light when we are in darkness. And there is only one God who never forgets where we are – who we are – and who we have been created to be.
[1] Cox, David W “The Edwin Friedman Model of Family Systems Thinking: Lessons For Organizational Leaders” (Arkansas State University 2006) [2] Thompson, Beverly A. and George B. “Finding Yourself in the In-between” (Alban Weekly, September 26, 2011 Issue #374) [3] Copenhaver, Martin B. “Stillspeaking Devotional:Finding God in All the Wrong Places” ( This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it September 21, 2011) [4] Thompson, Beverly A. and George B. “Finding Yourself in the In-between” (Alban Weekly, September 26, 2011 Issue #374)
[5] Nicholson, Roger S. Temporary Shepherds:A Congregational Handbook for Interim Ministry (Alban Instiute Inc 1998) pg 126 |